The 17th & 18th; I’ll finally have a smear!

October 20, 2016 — Leave a comment

The 17th of October. 

Today has been a pile of garbage. 

I’m still really achy, and was not thrilled at the prospect of sitting in my wheelchair much, but I didn’t think I’d be at the Women’s Hospital too long so it would be okay. How wrong I was. 

I arrived in colposcopy clinic at 11:15, but wasn’t seen until about 12, when Sue had come up and intervened (of her own volition; I didn’t even know she was coming). A nurse called me through, and we went to a room where I met Miss Byrom, and Sue and the two nurses were there too. We had a very brief chat about my problem, then it was jeans and pants off time. I put a gown on, and got into the very undignified position in the stirrups. On the ceiling were some pretty flowers, but I was far more interested in the screen with a big picture of my vagina on it. Miss Byrom attempted to insert a very small speculum, but it wouldn’t go in. There is some kind of obstruction, adhesion, like I had some sort of injury which has healed incorrectly. We have no idea what’s happened, but at least we have an explanation as to why I can’t be examined, and why I got nowhere with the dilators. So I’ll have to go back to be put under anaesthetic and my vagina will be “opened up”, to put it politely, and I’ll finally have a smear!

I then got taken to pre-op, where I waited for a good forty-five minutes before we even started. An auxiliary nurse did my height, weight and blood pressure, and I didn’t need an ECG because they have a recent one on file. Then back to the waiting room until a pre-op nurse could see me. 

I read some more of The Bone Clocks (I have made a great deal of progress in it today), and eventually a nurse came for me. We went to her room, and we had to go through all the usual questions. They had a lot of my information from my GA for the coil last year, so I gave her a potted version of my history, then made sure she had an up to date drugs list. She gave me several leaflets about GAs and preventing DVTs and PEs, then I took some blood forms off to the phlebotomist. That turned out to be the auxiliary nurse from before, poor woman, having to do multiple jobs. She said “That’s the NHS for you” and I said “That’s Jeremy Hunt for you”. Anyway. I finally got out at 3, and found Mommy in the car park who was very very bored and cold and hungry. 

Christine rang Mommy’s phone but we missed the call, then I rang her back to find that she’d tried to ring me but couldn’t get through, so we decided that when we got home, I’d back up my phone and tomorrow we’ll go to the Apple shop first thing. She’d actually phoned to complain about how the boiler people are a bunch of incompetent bastards and she won’t have any hot water until the end of the week, the second one of this saga. 

When we got home, we both ate lunch, then I went upstairs for an hour and a half to back up my phone. I couldn’t bear to sit for that long, so I lay on Christine’s bed with the electric blanket on to try to ease my back a little and listened to podcasts. It’s done now, and I’m looking forward to sleep. 

The 18th of October. 

Awake so early. Needed to be at the Apple shop for 9 to be able to see someone about my phone’s incoming call/text situation. I wasn’t first in the queue because being in the wheelchair, people walked past me into the shop while I had to wait for someone to activate the lift. Still, there were only a couple of people ahead of me, and the chap organising the Genius Bar said I’d be waiting about half an hour. He said I could leave and come back but there was no point, so Mommy went to Faculty to get me a coffee while I twiddled my thumbs. 

A guy came over about half past nine to hear about my issues, which I duly explained. He ran diagnostics and because of what I’d told him, he was happy to replace the phone once he’d checked it for any secret damage. That was all grand, except that they didn’t have any in stock, so I am awaiting an email to let me know one has been delivered. He has to say 10-14 days, but it’ll apparently be more like 5. 

Once finished my we went to Hotel Chocolat where I bought a Chocolate Yumpkin, and Boots for lip balm and some man tissues for Daddy before coming home. 

We had lunch and watched the new episode of Criminal Minds (so exciting I cannot explain), then Mommy ferried Grandma back and forth to Fellowship while I crocheted bits of the current project. 

The kittens were booked in for their first lot of jabs at 5, so we bundled them and Amy into the carriers to take them to the vet. It surprisingly easy to get them in, and there was no crying on the way. Lydon’s was full of dogs which I loved, but the cats were not so keen. I set the carriers facing each other so they were slightly comforted by that, and I crouched next to them. I took a lot of pictures of all the dogs but I didn’t pet any of them because I didn’t want the cats to smell them on me. 

When it was our turn, we started off with Amy, and she was good until it was time for the needle, at which point she spun round and hissed while the syringe was still in her neck. She was only too happy to go back in the carrier. All the kittens were really good; nobody hissed or scratched or bit, they were all just a bit wriggly. 

Back at home, I took a parcel that had been delivered to us next door, so I got to meet new neighbour Richard, who (it turns out) actually follows me on Twitter! He saw me in the Sutton Observer a while ago. Who knew we’d become neighbours? I also saw George again who was not poorly but he was a little bit grumpy because nursery had made him tired. I couldn’t stay long, because we had a lady coming to look at kittens and we needed to eat dinner before she arrived. 

I showed her Archie, Alfie and Angelica, as they’re the available ones. She really liked Alfie and Angelica  which is good because at least she’s got one who’s relatively confident. She asked all the right questions and I’m really happy with her as an adopter, so once the kittens are ready, she can have them!

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