The 26th of November.

My mouth is so sore. My tongue especially - I've gone through an entire bottle of difflam in three days. We're going to need to get a lot from clinics tomorrow. Haematology in the morning - walking in because I need to see someone and I will not have the same nonsense as last time, then I have liver in the afternoon.

This morning I ordered some Christmas presents, but I am lacking inspiration so I hope to find some in shops. Maybe in Harrods on the 9th?

This afternoon I wrote up all my Paris blog posts. Still have to catch up to real time! I've also been worrying about a pain on my right side but it seems to have faded. Every pang sends a jolt of fear through me - I so desperately don't want to go back into hospital.

I miss proper food. I am miserable.

The 27th of November.

Ah today was super busy and irksome at times but ended up really fun and had lovely moments in between the stressful ones.

This morning we dropped in at haematology clinic where we saw many people! Sean from photopheresis plus others, Anie and Helen, so that was fun. Went to see Ram who looked at my tongue and is basically letting us do my steroids. He's going to transfer my ECP funding from Rotherham to here so I can have it again and hopefully that'll help my mouth.

We had liver clinic this afternoon, but in between the two, we went to see Charlotte Caldwell so I could squidge baby Sophie! She was happy and bubbly which is my favourite kind of baby. We had to leave at 3 but had such fun while we were there. We got in really quickly at clinic (I think some Monica magic). James is happy with everything, go back in two weeks! My tongue really hurt from talking by the time we left and not even a milkshake soothed it. Stupid tongue.

The traffic going home was hell. Going to and from the QE today took us over an hour each way; so frustrating! Then when we got home, we only had just over an hour before we had to go out again. However, this time it was with Becky and Alison to try on wedding dresses!

It was so nice; like playing dress up! Becky took it somewhat more seriously than I as she will actually be getting married at some point, and now we know what shape/style she is getting. I tried on one dark blue dress which Mommy and Alison really liked, then I basically put on the most ridiculously frilly puffy meringue dresses I could find and ended up really liking some! I also tried on an actual gypsy dress that weighed four stone but felt like a cloud. Nobody cried and it was just a perfectly pleasant end to the day.