The 27th of June. I actually had a slightly more decent sleep last night, I think because I just so exhausted, so I didn't properly wake up until about seven this morning which is practically a lie-in for me right now.

So this morning I just bimbled and watched TV, then Danny came at one for training. He had me doing this thing where I lie on my back (I'm going to make a gif or something), holding the stability ball behind me and bringing my arms and legs up so the ball and my toes meet. It's really hard! I only managed about four of those, so I need to practise.

After he left, I stretched, I had some lunch and got changed. Mommy and Daddy have been in and out at Grandma's all day because there are issues with the TVs at Boldmere Court and they are being exceptionally useless at fixing them, especially to my dad as he knews what to do! I hear it has all been very frustrating.

I emailed Mark, the X Factor producer who organised my audition back in Manchester just to check that I was correct i assuming that I'm not through. I was indeed right, which is a shame but I get it and it's fine. He has, however, invited me to go and watch auditions at Wembley and meet the  judges which I will definitely be taking him up on! Isn't that lovely?

The 28th of June.

Back to four am. I going to have lorazepam tonight though so it's fine. Plus I've had a really nice day so I'm in an excellent mood.

I started my day with getting very kind tweets from people who subscribe to Cosmopolitan and had read the piece about me! I texted Julie to let her know and rang Mommy who was at Tesco to get to to check if there were any copies on shelves yet but there aren't. I have to be patient! And patience is not something I have in spades but I am trying.

So I spent my morning reading the paper , watching Saturday Kitchen and occasionally receiving a nice message! Then after lunch, Mommy, Daddy and I went to see Chef (a family cinema trip is a real rarity in our house). I really like it, except it did make me really hungry for all the food! Grilled cheese, cubanos, beignets. Oh, the beignets I had in Paris. They were so delicious. And Mommy felt inspired for tea so we had smoky gammon with butter beans, tomatoes, onions and spinach and it was goooood. Then I had some Ben and Jerry's Clever Cookies ice cream and that shit is yummy if you can get your hands on some.

I feel good tonight. A few people have tweeted me saying the piece made them cry, but it's supposed to be uplifting! If you're reading this and you got upset by it, please don't be. I'm okay, I really am, and you don't have to be sad. Bask in all that you are and can be, because life can be beautiful.