Archives For baby

The 7th of August. 

Still some pain today, but not quite as much. I had a decent enough sleep, but I’m still tired too. Too much activity for me for one day; my body is taking its time to recover. I’ve got very little on this week, just respiratory clinic and we’re back down to London this Saturday to do it all again. I will, at least, not have a gig to go to, so I can just rest when we get home. 

I spent most of my day working on blog posts, typing up the 3rd to the 6th, then uploading all the photos and culling the shit ones. Got to decide if I take my camera again this week, or if I take a different lens. We’re sitting in a different place so I need to work out what we’ll be able to see. 

I think I finished about half two, then I made two more squares of blanket while watching some more Glow. I’ll have to lay them out to work out how many I’m going to have to do. 

Tomorrow, I think I’ll stop the pregablin. A week of the double dose has done nothing but make me sleepy, burpy and hungry. The hunger is fucking me up because part of anorexia recovery is learning to feed yourself when you’re hungry, but now I’m having to ignore the hunger, tell myself it’s just the drug, and it’s so confusing. 

The 8th of August. 

Back to pretty much normal levels of pain today. I’ve binned off the pregablin because it has done fuck all for two weeks. I’ll be going back to see Dr. Blaney and we’ll discuss steroid injections. Stupid spine. 

Today has just been crocheting squares for the blanket. I did two or three this morning, in between visits to the kitchen to check on baking progress, because we made chocolate, ginger and sesame cookies and chocolate cupcakes with coffee frosting filling. 

After lunch, had a quick hairwash (very little colour is left in my hair now), then Mommy went to Grandma’s and I got back to crocheting. I’ve now got sixteen squares and I watched all the daytime crime dramas Sky Living has to offer. I think I’ll do four more and see how it looks. I don’t want the baby to grow out of it straight away!

The 3rd of August.

I didn’t get a huge amount of sleep last night. At least, not good quality sleep. I got some bad news just before I went to bed, so that was rolling around in my head all night.

This morning, I did a blog post, then I had a chiro appointment at half past eleven. Time for Trine to stretch out my back, try to get some relief because the pregablin is still not helping. I’m not sure if the double dose is also making me sleepy or if that’s because of the bad night. Ugh. We went into Sutton briefly so I could get some spray-in colour for my hair, because a lot of the dyed bits have been chopped off. I’m not seeing Saskia until mid-August, so I needed something very temporary to tide me over, stop me feeling boring.

After lunch, Mommy helped me with the hair spraying, then she went to Grandma’s and I started work on a blanket for Michaela’s baby while I watched Glow. Living up to the twenty-something grandma stereotype. Testing out different kinds of granny square because I’m that cool.

I’m tired. I want to go back to bed.

The 4th of August.

Bree is gone! Belle now; her new owner is a fan of Beauty and the Beast. They arrived shortly after ten, with the grandson in a much better mood, and a cardboard cat carrier for temporary use. Bree did not want to go – she kept leaping out of the top before I could get it closed; I had to chase her round the room and shove her in which was awful and I hated it but she was okay afterwards – she had some of her toys and a blanket that Betty has been sleeping on. Fingers crossed.

I did the Catalog admin that comes post-adoption, and went to do other kittens that have been done, to find them not on the list where they should have been. I subsequently found them in the system, with the adoption bit already having been done. I found out Nicole has been doing them which she is not supposed to, because she doesn’t have all the information. I have asked her to stop doing that please, so hopefully that sorts it out.

This afternoon, Daddy and I went to see Valerian. It’s quite a fun film – Cara Delevingne pretty much carries the plot. I like that her character is cool and badass, but Valerian is still her boss despite being an asshole and pretty stupid, which pissed me off. I also didn’t like their flirty relationship because I think they look like siblings. The film did not need to end with them banging against a window.

The 18th of April. 

Oh God, I am so bored already by all the Brexit/Bremain talk. I’m still not sure which way I’ll vote but nobody is swaying me either way. I’m going to have to try to find unbiased information and go from that. Tricky. 

I went outside today, decided to break the monotony. This morning, while doing my blog post, I had a minor revelation. I suspect the reason my neck always hurts on one side is because of the way I sit when blogging, so I’ll have to adjust that and see what happens. (Calm down.)

Gym this afternoon. I was working my way through my routine, nearing the end, when I saw Hoarder Lady from across the room on the bikes. I could see that the mats were free, so I decided to bin off my last two machines and go straight to the floor. Yes, I am that petty. Then I left at a good time because Happy Clappy Chap turned up as I was going out of the door. 

Monica seems to be my friend again. I have given her lots of belly rubs. 

The 19th of April. 

It has been a good day because I got to squidge a baby. This morning, Mommy was out at Joan’s funeral, and after I finished my breakfast, I went to sit with Monica. However, I ended up not staying very long, because after running up and down the room like she’d been at the cat mint, she did a horrifically smelly poo and I had to leave. 

Ellie came round with Esmé after lunch, and we had a delightful afternoon of Disney films, smiles and squidges. She is teething, so very drooly, and had a bit of a grumble when she was needing some food, but otherwise we still had a lot of fun. She’s grown so much in the 9 nine weeks since I last saw her, we can’t leave it that long again. I just love to look at her; she stares back at me, so wide-eyed, mouth open, and I wonder what she sees. Everything is new and exciting for her. Ellie and I managed to have a bit of chat but it was mainly in baby voices to Es. Can’t help it. If I could have my own children, no one would ever hear my normal voice ever again. 

The 10th of February. 

It has been a most boring day, unfortunately. None of us had a good sleep, we’re blaming the pancakes. Not that that’ll stop us having them again. 

I was correct about the pain I expected – everything is very stiff and sore, so every time it bend, stretch, extend, tense a muscle, I’m wincing. Standing up and sitting down results in involuntary noises, and I walk at the speed of a lame tortoise. 

The wheelchair engineer was booked to come and fix the opening and closing mechanism between twelve and four, so I spent the afternoon in the armchair, crocheting and watching the window/tv. Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D, Agent Carter, Pretty Little Liars. I’m nearly at the end of season 3. The chap’s only just arrived now, at six o’clock. It sounds like he’s had a dreadful day. Thankfully, it also sounds like he’s in the process of fixing it. 

I was supposed to have renal clinic this afternoon, but the engineer appointment kind of took precedence. I’m glad I rescheduled it, because I couldn’t have crossed a picket line. A solution to the contract problem was put on the table that everyone was happy with, but Jeremy Hunt vetoed it, the insufferable bastard. 

Wheelchair is done! All fixed, I am mobile again!

The 11th of February. 

I have had the most fun day. Well, the morning was not so fun – I’m still very creaky from the gym so moving was tough. I had the chiro at 11:15, but had to spend the moments before we left trying to chase the nasty black and white cat away from the fence where it was attacking Oscar. 

The chiro was good, slightly painful, some serious neck manipulation and squeezing but I gritted my teeth and dealt with it. We went straight from there to Ellie’s which is about five minutes away. Her flat is up two flights of stairs, but thankfully Mommy wanted to meet baby Esmé too, so she climbed up to her front door while I waited in the vestibule. 

Ellie popped Elle’s postcode into her SatNav and off we went! Esmé was very good, slept for almost the whole journey, but when we arrived, Elle wasn’t home! Luna had had a bad night so she’d only just been able to go to tbf shop to get our lunch, bless her. Luna wanted a hug from me straight away which made me very happy, she remembers her Aunty Kathryn, bringer of crocheted goods and farm ladies. 

We then spent about four hours just sitting, chatting, eating, trying to keep Luna amused. Esmé is a lot easier to entertain at just ten weeks, whereas Luna needs a little bit more attention. I got a lovely hug from Esmé when she just fell asleep on me for about an hour which was bliss. I obviously have magic powers. We decided at about five we really had to make our move, and Luna got very sad! Poor poppet. Although I am sure she got over it very quickly. 

I love babies. All the babies. Just none for me.

The 29th of November. 

I was thinking I might have a Zopiclone tonight having had bad sleeps recently, but after a visit from Elle, Ben and Luna, I don’t think I’ll need it. She is a tiny whirlwind human. 

This morning I busied myself with a blog post and the assembling of a crocheted thing. I am being vague about it in case someone finds out what their presents are. It took a good couple of hours because it’s quite a stressful process, making sure everything goes in the right place and is adequately stuffed. Got that finished, then lunch. The Winnington-Coes were supposed to arrive at half one but they were a tad late so I started sewing up another thing but didn’t quite finish it. 

Once they arrived, it was mild chaos. She will march off in any direction. Many things came out of the bags to entertain her, mainly musical books. We also spent a long time trying to get her to make a duck noise, and were suitably delighted when she did. The only word she can really say is “car”. Ben dearly wishes he understood her ramblings and one day they’ll make sense but for now it’s just noises and pointing. 

I didn’t get any smashy hugs this time, just a little headbutt. They headed off at about half four, when she got grizzly and sleepy, and took her new hat and mittens with them. She refuses to wear hats right now, but that’s fine because it’s a bit big so she can grow into it. 

I love watching her grow. I hope I get to for as long as possible. 

The 30th of November. 

It was a normal day. Daddy forgot his glasses again so we were taking them to him, then doing a couple of jobs in town. I took back one of the purses I’d bought for Mommy to House of Fraser, then went to John Lewis to get my wrapping paper. Doing a red and white theme. 

They didn’t have the sort of ribbon I wanted, so we went to Paperchase because I knew they would. We were moving through Selfridges, and there was a man dawdling in front of me so I swerved and overtook him. The next thing I knew, I felt this man’s full weight on top of me, one elbow in my head, his other hand on my bag. He used me to push himself up, and I asked him if he was alright. He didn’t extend the same courtesy to me, and walked away. I buried my face in my scarf, breathed deep, willed the tears back into my eyes. I know I make jokes about being invisible, but I’ve never been fallen on before. I was in front of him and he claimed he didn’t see me. It really hurt, physically and emotionally. It made me feel like nothing, no one. It’s like I live on the cusp of a normal life. I know that when I’m in the chair, all people see is the chair, but today they didn’t even see that. I don’t have anyone I can talk to about this. Nobody I know could understand.

The 21st of August.

Argh I hate blood tests at unsociable times. I had to get up at seven to leave at half past eight for a test to check if I have hyperkalemia (high potassium). It’s because I started this new blood pressure drug which can elevate potassium, and as mine tends to run on the high side, Dr. Hewins wanted to check that it wasn’t being tipped over the edge. Hopefully it’s fine (I haven’t heard to the contrary) because it’s working. 

I was supposed to meet Vicky in town for lunch but she had to postpone last minute, but we went there anyway to collect train tickets for a trip to London in early September, when I’m going to meet Margot Martini’s parents. 

For the rest of the day, I’ve been rather lazy, watching things on the TiVo box, but in the past couple of hours I’ve been attempting to crochet a hat. We’ll see how it goes. 

The 22nd of August. 

It’s always a good day when babies are involved. This morning I only had time to read about half the paper before it was time to go to Elle’s. Mommy was going to take me but then Daddy offered so she she could watch athletics. After car-swapping and grabbing blue badges, we did eventually set off. 

When I arrived, Luna was just sitting on the floor, being ever so good, then she crawled to me! Last time, she refused to crawl. She even sort of stands now! We had some fun floor time while Elle packed up all of the things, then we went off in the car to get lunch because there was no food. We went to a little café near her house where I had a mozzarella and basil panini with secret tomato in which I had to remove. We just talked and swatted wasps away from Luna until a man sprayed them all (thankfully, not near us). While Elle paid, Luna and I played with my bottle of water (great toy) and at one point she just rested her head on my chest and we had a little hug. It was so lovely. 

When we got back, there was more floor play, and Luna tried to climb me a lot. Leggings are good for that. So she stood on my lap a lot and chewed on my necklace, and did her version of a cuddle which is just to kind of smash you with her body and face. She’d worn herself out a bit as she’d been awake since half five, and she was sitting on my lap while I scratched her belly, and she just dropped off! Just a little snooze, about half an hour, then it was teatime! Mommy came to get me just after, and I got more smashy hugs. I didn’t want to leave, I could squish her all day long.

Once we’d had our dinner, Becky and James came over post-honeymoon to tell us about it and catch up on what had happened while they were gone. Can’t believe it’s already a week since they got married. 

The 8th of July.

A joyous day of hospital fun. My morning was haematology clinic. Ram is annoyed that Igor put me on iron supplements without doing an iron test, and I can’t stop it and have one because “it doesn’t work like that”. He looked at my leg and has spoken to Andrew who wants an ultrasound before he’ll do a lineogram, and we should get a phone call or a letter about that. It better not be for when I’m away. 

We had to come home so Mommy would take Grandma to lunch club, then we had our lunches and went back out to take her back, then we went to liver clinic. I dropped off my three page prescription at pharmacy, then they had plenty of time to do it because my 3.15 appointment with James didn’t happen until 4.45. He’s too popular! Philippa’s gone to have her baby now there’s a new temporary youth nurse but it’s one I like from 726 so we were happy to see her. James was forgiven for his lateness because he showed us pictures of his baby son. So cute! 

We picked up two massive bags from pharmacy, then drove home and got here just after six, so that is all for today. Looking forward to seeing Lauren tomorrow. 

The 9th of July.

Top-notch day. Good sleep, bit of a lie-in and a nice morning. I had a delivery of a dress from Asos which I’d ordered in two sizes, and I’m keeping the one that fits because I love it. Rust-coloured shirt dress. 

I had an appointment to get my hair cut at Black Sheep at half twelve, so I took some pictures of Emma Watson’s pixie cut and Michaela worked her magic with the scissors and I look fabulous! She showed me some pictures of baby Blossom, and I’ll see her in person on Tuesday when James colours my hair. I don’t know what shade in going yet, it depends on what colour the bridesmaid dresses are. 

Mommy took me straight into town to meet Lauren and she had some shopping to do. I was early so I had a candied bacon bagel for lunch while I waited, then we just hung out for a couple of hours, talking about her masters, Kim Kardashian, friends’ babies and my annoyance at Igor for leaving. 

Lauren went to get some paint, and I needed a sunhat and have ended up with two from Accessorize, then talked to Christine on the phone on the way back to the car.