Archives For miller & carter

The 7th of January. 

Fuck I am still so tired, despite having caught up on sleep I missed at New Year. I think it’s because I’m still coughing a lot, especially in the mornings – they are awful. I would really like to feel good again soon. 

This morning, I wrote up a blog post, went on a hunt for a place for us to eat on my birthday (settled on Where the Pancakes Are, yum), then did some Cats Protection training. There was a new fosterers induction so I went through it. I did learn something so it wasn’t a waste of time. 

After lunch, I rang a potential adopter and forwarded him to the appropriate fosterer so hoping that’s a good match when he goes to see the kitty tomorrow. 

The rest of my time has been spent finishing the blanket – I just need to sew the fin to the tail and it’ll be done! Rainbow mermaid tail. It’s quite snug – only to be worn with leggings or tights. Unless it stretches. 

Tonight I will have to give the kittens lots of hugs before they go tomorrow. I will miss their stupid, pretty, rascally faces. 

The 8th of January. 

Not feeling quite so shitty today. Everything is still the same, I’ve just had a reasonable amount of sleep. Praying the postman brings me an appointment for a venogram tomorrow. Or someone calls me. Please. 

Shaki came this morning to pick up the kittens so they could go to Exeter. They were very scrabbly and did not want to go, which I took to mean that they will miss me. It meant we had to get them into the carrier very quickly, so I didn’t really get to say a proper goodbye. Probably a good thing or I might have had a cry. 

When they were gone, I had to call a potential adopter, then I finished my blanket. I’m not sure when I’ll use it, but it’s fun. 

We took Grandma to Miller and Carter for lunch because it’s her birthday tomorrow. I had scallops and then brisket, which I managed to eat quite successfully. Mash and gravy were very handy aids to mastication. 

Since getting home, I have begun making a jumper. I’m using the pattern from the last jumper I made, but with quite a lot of alterations – it’ll be shorter, have a narrower body, longer and narrower sleeves, and a smaller neckline. Just a little bit different. 

The 26th of February. 

Another bad sleep! Well, it took me ages to fall asleep, but then I did at least stay that way. I got up and went downstairs in my pyjamas so I could give Mommy her card and presents before she had to go and take Grandma to coffee morning. She loves the earrings and is very intrigued by all the different recipes in The Little Book of Scones. When she came back, she opened the rest of her stuff which was mini loaf tins and recipes to go with them, and lots of teas from Hilary and Jeremy so she’s basically got an afternoon tea kit!

We went out to Miller & Carter for lunch. I decided to only have a main course because they’re quite large and my stomach would not cope with a starter too. I was right because I didn’t finish my meal anyway! I ate my steak and sweet potato fries but I couldn’t fit the rest in. 

When we were finished, we took Grandma home, then had a quick trip to M&S to get a birthday cake because for the first time in living memory, we have not had time to make one! We’ve had a phone call from Christine to say Happy Birthday, and I’m still feeling like I need to lie down. 

The 27th of February. 

I have been sleepy all day because I had two Zopiclone last night so when my alarm went off, I did not want to get out of bed. I had to though, because I needed coffee and that was downstairs. 

I made it and spent the morning reading the interesting bits of the paper like the story about Ginger Nuts returning to circulation which is obviously the most important one. 

The rest of the day has been TiVo/Netflix. I finished the baby blanket I was doing for Sheila so I can give that to her at an opportune moment, and I might start on the next outfit for the doll soon. Schoolgirl or pyjamas?

Becky and James have been over, although James only very briefly, and now Becky’s school has some chambers underground which are being leaked into and may or may not have asbestos? Fun times. I also lent her my Harry Potter wand and Gryffindor scarf so she can be Hermione for World Book Day at school. Obviously. 

The 16th of December. 

I had to have another Zopiclone night because my brain was too excited about Lauren and Grazia today! 

So obviously the first thing I did this morning was to go round the corner and buy all the Grazia! Well, we bought three. Had to leave some behind for other people to buy! Mommy read it and had a tiny cry so I smushed her and pretended to be a penguin. 

Lauren came round at half twelve for pizza and The Grinch! We put her vegan pizzas in the oven and I ordered Domino’s and it was delicious. I gave her her scarf and it swamps her but that is what she wanted so that’s good! Her mum had bought me a Hotel Chocolat Christmas Sleekster box, and Lauren had made me gingerbread so I’m definitely going to be starting on the winter bulking! All the foods. 

When Mommy came home from Grandma’s, we went through the photos Grazia sent so I’ll post my favourites at some point. Then it was time for her to go! We had lots of hugs and it was so good to see her, my lil sis. 

The 17th of December. 

Today has been really pretty great. Christmas music in the car on the way to the QE which is always a good way to start the day. Then some twitter magic happened in that someone my my mum was friends with at school and still sends Christmas cards to had a daughter who went to school with Josie Long and in short, she’s going to come to my house to do a private gig in February! I was sat in photopheresis, grinning insanely. People are great. 

This afternoon I have been wrapping all of the things! Well, I wrapped Mommy and Daddy’s presents. It took the entirety of The Polar Express and a little bit longer. I love that film -it is one of my few good memories of ward 8. I stopped at about half past five, by which time my ankles and feet were really swollen from the amlodipine and extra fluid you get given back during photopheresis. 

Tonight I went to Miller & Carter with Becky for festive food and joy. There was only one problem – none of my shoes fit me because my feet were so enormous. I wore Mommy’s size 8 boots when I’m normally a 6/7. The skin is so stretched, it’s so painful. Anyway! The food was super tasty and we were defeated – couldn’t even finish our main courses! 

When we got back, Hamilton decided to be a gladiator! I filmed him and added the Gladiators theme tune. It’s probably one of my greatest achievements.  





The 17th of June.

I took a Zopiclone again last night because my tongue was aching like crazy. Still woke up at half five because that is my life.

I worked out again this morning because I know I won’t have time to tomorrow, plus I am going to consume approximately one zillion calories at Five Guys and Miller & Carter. I finished just in time for my ASOS delivery, only one item from which I am keeping. I also had a delivery of macarons from Dr. Tim! They are trialling delivery at Macarons & More and I was a guinea pig. I can confirm that they arrived intact, beautifully presented and testing even better than before which I didn’t think possible! I’ve had the lemon, the salted caramel, and the vanilla so far.

Mommy and I went to town this afternoon because I haven’t been for what seems like ages, and I got a dress from Oasis and a mascara. Selfridges are revamping or something and it’s dreadful. The womenswear is split between the 3rd and 4th floors, all price ranges smushed together. It makes no sense and is utterly bizarre to try and navigate. I have emailed them about it.

When we got back, we tried to flush my line again (it’s misbehaving) and it’s just sucking things up and won’t bleed. It won’t even give back the saline immediately after you’ve pushed it in. It’s a good thing I’m at the QE tomorrow.

I helped Becky decorate some cakes for her Grandma’s birthday (my piping skills were in demand) and tonight I have painted my nails.

The 18th of June.

Holy fucking God I am so tired. Steroids are the worst. I’ve been awake since five am. I decided to get up at seven-ish because I was too hungry to stay in bed any longer. This morning I began as I meant to go on, as today was going to be terrible in terms of diet without question. I chopped up some dark chocolate and shoved it into a croissant which I subsequently shoved into my face.

I met Sadie for lunch at Five Guys at half twelve, which was less busy than I expected. A queue did form while we were there though so maybe we were just early? I ordered a hot dog with ketchup (I was afraid of going too fat-heavy) and she had a double bacon cheeseburger. We had a medium Cajun fries to share, but they were way too spicy for my lips to deal with so I only ate about two. I saw Alison Hammond and said hi (we’ve met a few times so she vaguely recognises me now), and Sadie and I caught up on each other’s super-exciting lives. She has to write two chapters of her thesis by the 23rd, so today’s hangout was a tiny break from work. I knew I needed to leave town by 2 as we were going to see the photopheresis nurses about my line before liver clinic, so we went across to Starbucks so I could get a mocha cookie crumble frappuccino at about quarter to (I said it was a bad diet day), then I went back to the car and off to the QE!

The nurses are completely befuddled by my line’s behaviour, after having had a good go at it. They rang Ram and he wants it out ASAP, so I’m back tomorrow at 12.30 for someone to yank it out of my chest. Fun. Then we went to liver clinic, where we saw Philippa for the first time since before she went to have her baby! She showed us lots of pictures. We got in to see James very quickly and there wasn’t much to say – just told him what had been going on with my mouth and skin, drug changes, sporadic bleeding and he checked that Andy Toogood had made the referral which he has. Apparently this gynae lady is the wife of one of the liver consultants who I think I’ve met only once but it’s always good to have a connection. He wanted some bloods as I haven’t had any proper ones done for about a month, so after he’d advised me against any more fried food, I went and got stabbed and we came home!

Tonight Grandma took us to Miller & Carter because Maureen and Audrey have come down to visit (she calls them “the girl” even though they are in their eighties), so I erred on the side of caution and ate a sirloin steak and a few sweet potato wedges but was generally terrible company because I am exhausted.

It is half past nine and I am going to bed.

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The 16th of April.

Tonight I am a schweepy bear but it because I have actually been outside and done things. This morning I got Mommy to wash my hair, then I met up with Vicky at Yorks for lunch.

She is one of my few proper cancer friends and she sort of disappeared when it emerged that I cannot be fixed. I understand why she did – fear. It’s okay because she came back and I love her. I do not hold nonsensical grudges. I get why some people have pulled away – it’s easier not to be close to me when I do die, so you’re not so sad when it happens. Anyway, we had a lovely time, eating foods (me eggs florentine, her lamb flatbread) and drinking coffee. We nabbed the sunny window table, then got too warm and had to move. It was nice for a while though.

When I got home, Becky came round to borrow some books to take on holiday, and now I am weary.

The 17th of April.

I think today might have been the last day of my period, thank God. Stupid life-ruining enforced menstruation.

From lunchtime onwards, I was quite a busy bee. I’d spent my morning replying to some emails and hunting through a multitude of old photos, finding one I haven’t seen in a long time of me on the phone to Christine after I’d had one of the tumours in my face biopsied.

This afternoon, I thought I should work out as I hadn’t for the past two days, so I did all that until about half four, when Mommy and I watched an episode of Criminal Minds. When that finished, I got changed and made myself presentable, then went over the road to go out with Becky, James, Jamie and Natalia for Jamie’s 21st birthday meal at Miller & Carter. They still hadn’t got any mango puree which Becky and I were rather irked by. So she had the Grey Goose Le Fizz and I had a Cosmopolitan which I was pleasantly surprised by! James was starving so we went to our table and he ordered ribs while the rest of us had steak. I had the 14oz T-bone and it was super tasty. I didn’t touch my lettuce wedge.

None of us could fit in pudding, so we left after just main courses and went back to the Easts’ for birthday cake! It was a really good cake; I was impressed with Natalia’s baking skills.

Now I am really full and sleepy.

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The 8th of April.

What a fun day!

This morning was not super-exciting; had breakfast, watched tv, despaired at what my skin has decided to do while I’ve been on Provera.

This afternoon, Becky escaped from school early and we went to Miller and Carter for lunch as we were going to see Miranda tonight! We ended up having three courses and they were so delicious. We had the sharing platter to start with, although we had no pork bites so we got an extra chicken wing instead. Then we both had steak with sweet potato fries – I had fillet rare and it was divine. Then for pudding, Becky had sticky toffee pudding and I had three scoops of chocolate ice cream with a cookie and then we were both really sleepy.

We were home for about an hour before we went out again to the NIA. We found our seats, then sat and twiddled our thumbs until the Miranda party started! It was such fun – she has a fabulous playlist of 90s pop and we left feeling like our lives had been thoroughly affirmed.

The 9th of April.

I have wanted to sleep all day but resisted the urge. I got up at half past nine and had breakfast and coffee before getting dressed, then we went to the chiropractor for half past twelve. There was serious work to be done on my neck and upper back, causing me to grimace and tell Trine “yeah it’s fine” through a tightly clenched jaw.

We visited M&S on the way home because we had no salad or salt beef, then when we got home, I made some of it into my lunch. I then started working out, and Mommy came home from taking Grandma home from lunch club. Oscar fell in the pond but we’re not sure how because his back legs and tail were wet, but also part of his upper back? It was definitely the muddy water because he smelled terrible.

Speaking of Oscars, Pistorius is now just constantly weeping and wailing and now it just feels like he is stalling. You can cry all you like Oscar, but I’m sorry, I just don’t believe you.

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The 9th of January.

Today has felt very busy, but I’ve been sat down for most of it. We went to the QE for 10am today for my first photopheresis session with my veins. It didn’t start off brilliantly, with me being stabbed and not bleeding, but then not stopping bleeding when the needle came out. Then they thought they’d have a go with the PICC line, which we were not optimistic about, and were correct – it’s just too small. Then we had to wait for my right arm to stop bleeding before we could try going back in. So eventually I got going at 11:40. Then I pootled along quite nicely and was finished just after two o’clock, which was a lot quicker than we expected.

We waited for a little while afterwards, to make sure I didn’t leak, then we left and got home just before three. I had coffee and changed my jumper, then we went to Grandma’s. Took more flowers (she has a small garden in there now) and some cards, then we went to Miller & Carter and waited for Daddy.

Sophie from the deli was there! She sort of squealed my name and ran over, so we had a brief hug and chat, then we went to sit down. Daddy wasn’t too later, but he’d told us his order so our food came and we chowed down. I was so hungry, I didn’t even take a photo! I had an 8oz sirloin steak medium rare with chips, béarnaise sauce and lettuce with blue cheese and Stilton dressing. Then I had chocolate brownie and ice cream which I couldn’t finish. Yes, I am now utterly stuffed.

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The 10th of January.

Woke up at six but feeling okay. Got on the scales and I’ve put on another three pounds, which I can just about tolerate but that’s pretty much my limit. I’m now in a strange place where I try to get back to my “normal” eating without consciously restricting my intake. Lack of exercise makes me feel lazy but breathing is unpredictable at the moment.

Anyway. I had photopheresis again today, and we got going much quicker than yesterday. Got into the vein on the first try, and then I just sat there for two and a half hours while my blood got treated.

We left just after one, after Jo changed my PICC line dressing and we got some supplies. We went to Charlotte Caldwell’s house, mother of Emma who I was treated with at BCH and Sophie who is a gorgeous squidgy baby, to deliver a blanket from Project Linus for Emma. Charlotte tried not to cry and I played with squidgy Sophie. She was quite enamoured with my boots and handbag, so that got covered up before she attempted to eat it.

We drove home, I had a coffee, blogged and read Hadley Freeman’s book. I now have Jamie Oliver on and God, he’s irritating.