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The 29th of January.

Finally I had a good night. Let’s hope it continues.

This morning, I did a blog post, then got back to work on Anton the angel. His hair took pretty much until lunchtime as it involves tiny complicated stitches. Glad that’s over.

I also rang Piccadilly to book an eye test because they sent me a reminder last week. I went to the last one and she basically couldn’t read my results because the GvHD had made my vision really inconsistent, but I think it might be stable enough now for us to try again, so that’s Thursday.

After lunch, my Little Prince soundtrack was delivered (nobody bought it for my birthday or Christmas so I had to treat myself) – I had to buy the CD because the music is not digitally available anywhere! Now I have to do something I haven’t done for years and rip a CD. I bet the youth wouldn’t know what that means. Then I made the halo, wings and arms of Anton, and put him together. Three down, three to go.

The 30th of January.

I have been awake since quarter past four. Not thrilled. I don’t know why – just woke up and couldn’t get back to sleep. Now my brain is all itchy and I’m looking forward to bedtime.

I have at least been productive. My crochet magazines have come back out of hiding after Christmas and I decided it was time to digitally catalogue the patterns I wanted to keep in PDF form. I’ve been able to get rid of all my TOFT magazines, which took a couple of hours and about 30% of my phone battery. I’ll have to do a few of these sessions to get through them all.

I then got started on Woody the pine cone, and worked on him until lunchtime. I also had a delivery of a yarn swift, which is like an umbrella you can stretch a hank of wool around and it holds it taut while I use the other thing I ordered, a yarn ball winder to make it into a ball! It is so satisfying and much quicker than my previous method, which involved chairs and tables which didn’t stay still and took hours. I did five balls today in the time it took me to do one before. It was still tiring though – my heart rate went to to 135 winding the spool.

After that, I ripped The Little Prince CD to my iMac, then I made a coffee and returned to Woody while watching Blindspot. It seems somewhat nonsensical so far.

The 12th of May. 

A day of mainly driving so not a great deal to report. 

Got up early because we needed to take the kittens to Shaki at the vet at 10:30 as she’s taking them to be neutered tomorrow so Simon can pick them up on Saturday. They were very good at travelling, barely made a sound, they just looked at me mournfully through the bars of the cat carrier. 

We were supposed to be setting off at twelve, but that went out of the window when Daddy discovered a nail in one of his tyres, so he had to take it to be fixed before we could go anywhere. We finally left the drive just after half past one. 

It has been a very uneventful journey. I crocheted three cat legs, listened to nostalgic 90s sunshine music, and I resisted the urge to buy a brownie batter Krispy Kreme at the services. Oh and we saw many tiny baby sheep!

Now I’m sitting on the single bed in the room up all the stairs, and I am going to read Stalker by Lars Kepler until it is time for dinner. I have identified one dish on the menu that I am prepared to eat (everything now involves aspects like “soy sauce meringue” or “mango and alfalfa sprouts”). Breakfast looks more promising – do I choose French toast or buttermilk pancakes?

The 13th of May. 

I am in need of vegetables. I have eaten a lot of artery-clogging food today. 

I had a much better sleep then I did last time we stayed at this place – I was still warm but I got rid of a layer and slept like a log. I met Mommy and Daddy for breakfast at 9 and I went for the French toast. It was scrumptious. I got a phone call from Shaki after I’d finished, to discuss the kittens’ bowel habits. After a lengthy chat about what they’ve been eating and when certain things have changed, they will now all be staying with us until at least Wednesday when they will hopefully be back to normal. 

The weather was glorious, so we packed up the car and had a drive round the Great Orme before going to pick up Taid. When we arrived, he was still having his breakfast so we amused ourselves while he got on with getting ready. He’d changed his mind about the lunch venue because he wasn’t enamoured with the service at our original destination, so we went to The Castle in Conwy. 

The menu choice was absolutely vast, but I eventually settled on the Saltimbocca sandwich, which was a fried sandwich stuffed with mozzarella, parma ham and sage-infused chicken. So good. Conversation mainly revolved around a grave that we have the deed to and whether we put a stone on it or not. Such excitement. 

When we’d finished, Daddy and Taid went to a clock shop because Taid was having an issue with one he’d bought from there, while Mommy and I went to the ice cream parlour across the road. I got two scoops, one salted caramel and one coffee, while Mommy had one of peach ripple. Then we sat on a wall outside in the sunshine and watched all the dogs that walked past.

Back at Taid’s, Mommy and I sat quietly in the corner for an hour while Daddy installed our old tv in the place of Taid’s. Once he’d plugged it all in, it became apparent that the better screen showed up the dodgy signal Taid gets, and in the end, he decided he wanted his old tv back on which you can’t tell that the picture is crap. 

Having sorted all that, it had got to quarter to five, and we really had to get going. Three and a half hours later, we are home! Becky has just been round to chat about her new job and other life events, and soon it will be time for bed. 

The 2nd of June.

Just seven and a half hours in hospital today, then an hour and a half drive home. Despite having two units of blood, I’m pretty pooped. I was awake at quarter to seven, ready to be at hospital for nine for my blood before ECP. No checked my haemoglobin and it had gone down again to 8.4, so it was a good thing she’d ordered two units for me. 

From then on, it was fairly dull. I read the paper, and took the time as a good one to listen to some new albums in their entirety – Wolf Alice, Kacey Musgraves and Amber Run. I’d just got on to Florence and the Machine when Igor came along to talk about my leg and recurrent anaemia. The leg – well, we are going to get Ram to talk to Dr. Lester, the thrombosis man, about getting me off clexane, and I just have to live with my leg being boggy until it gets worse and we can do something then. For the anaemia, it appears that I’m iron deficient, so I have more tablets to take! Joy. This is probably the last time we’ll see him because he leaves in a week! I will be very sad to lose him, he’s been so great. Lucky Glaswegians. 

Then just the 90 minute drive home, and here I am. Phew. 

The 3rd of June.

Heavy cloud. It came over me this morning when I realised quite how big the difference in the size of my legs is. It looks like I’ve had a cast on the left one and it’s withered away, when it’s in fact the correct size. This is all Ram’s fucking fault and he’s going to bloody fix it. I’m angry because the way it looks is the only good thing about my body and he’s fucked that up.

Photopheresis was an hour late in getting started too, so that annoyed me more, then the hot dog I had at Colmore Food Fest was fine but not exactly warm, and we encountered traffic on the way home that meant we were too late to pick up packages from the sorting office, so I’ll have to get those tomorrow morning. 

I’m just sitting here in festering rage because once again I look like a fucking freak and it’s someone’s fault and it’s not going to get fixed before we go away so I have to feel like shit about myself for weeks.