Archives For pregablin

The 7th of August. 

Still some pain today, but not quite as much. I had a decent enough sleep, but I’m still tired too. Too much activity for me for one day; my body is taking its time to recover. I’ve got very little on this week, just respiratory clinic and we’re back down to London this Saturday to do it all again. I will, at least, not have a gig to go to, so I can just rest when we get home. 

I spent most of my day working on blog posts, typing up the 3rd to the 6th, then uploading all the photos and culling the shit ones. Got to decide if I take my camera again this week, or if I take a different lens. We’re sitting in a different place so I need to work out what we’ll be able to see. 

I think I finished about half two, then I made two more squares of blanket while watching some more Glow. I’ll have to lay them out to work out how many I’m going to have to do. 

Tomorrow, I think I’ll stop the pregablin. A week of the double dose has done nothing but make me sleepy, burpy and hungry. The hunger is fucking me up because part of anorexia recovery is learning to feed yourself when you’re hungry, but now I’m having to ignore the hunger, tell myself it’s just the drug, and it’s so confusing. 

The 8th of August. 

Back to pretty much normal levels of pain today. I’ve binned off the pregablin because it has done fuck all for two weeks. I’ll be going back to see Dr. Blaney and we’ll discuss steroid injections. Stupid spine. 

Today has just been crocheting squares for the blanket. I did two or three this morning, in between visits to the kitchen to check on baking progress, because we made chocolate, ginger and sesame cookies and chocolate cupcakes with coffee frosting filling. 

After lunch, had a quick hairwash (very little colour is left in my hair now), then Mommy went to Grandma’s and I got back to crocheting. I’ve now got sixteen squares and I watched all the daytime crime dramas Sky Living has to offer. I think I’ll do four more and see how it looks. I don’t want the baby to grow out of it straight away!

The 1st of August. 

I am very tired because I woke up at ten past six for no reason, and couldn’t go back to sleep. I’ve had three coffees, but the caffeine has worn off and now I am weary again. 

I didn’t get up upon waking; I stayed in bed, listening to the radio for a while. When I did get out of bed, I did a blog post, and I phoned around for an appointment with somebody about my arm. I’m going to see a surgeon who does various procedures for lymphoedema, and she’s obviously very busy because the earliest I could see her is mid-September! Still, it’s before the clinic, and I need this fixing. 

I was at Black Sheep at 11.45 to get my hair cut. I saw June, as Michaela’s off until October, and now my back and sides are super short, with the top long. The last time the clippers were used so much on my hair was when we shaved it pre-chemo on my kitchen floor. Ah, memories!

After lunch, I went into town with Mommy who was giving blood. While she did that, I went shopping – I bought a skirt from Oasis, some wool from John Lewis, and I had a brow consultation at Benefit. I really had no idea what to do or use, and now I do! Then I got a text from Mommy who was finished, and we came home to find the towels that had been drying were wet again. British summer. 

The 2nd of August. 

I was woken up today by Daddy phoning me to find out where Mommy was. I didn’t know, because I had been asleep (she was here, just not near her phone), but I was glad he’d woken me because I’d been having a horrible dream in which Christine had got drunk and had sex in my bed, then she’d drawn all over my bedroom walls and I was trying to erase it, but everyone thought I was overreacting and her behaviour was fine which was really frustrating! Stupid brain. 

My day has been spent crocheting and assembling the panda. I finished off the body this morning, then we had lunch and watched last night’s Criminal Minds: Beyond Borders. Then this afternoon, I made the arms, ears, tail and scarf, then I put him all together! He is very cute but might look a bit terrifying to a new baby. I hope not. 

I have been needing lots of Rennies recently because my tummy is full of wind and I suddenly realised it might be to do with pregablin. Looked at the side effects and yep. Also it’s why I’m so much hungrier. Still not helping the pain. 

Had a lady come and see Bree with her daughter and grandson. They fell in love, and the little boy started crying when he realised they couldn’t take her home today! Bless.

The 26th of July. 

Industrious day. 

I had a rather confusing start to the day, because first my brain thought it was Sunday, then that it was half past ten, neither of which were true. After registering what day and time it actually was, I got up and dressed for a day which appeared like it was going to be chilly, when actually this afternoon it’s got quite warm. I don’t know what’s going on, frankly. 

I did a blog post, then got the minion out, which I’ve been working on most of the day. I have now finished the dungarees and all the embroidery on them. Now I have several small details to make – limbs, eye, etcetera. I have nothing to do but work on him so I don’t think it’ll take long before he is finished. Then panda, thing for Michaela’s daughter, things for Pete and Sophie’s twins. Going to be a busy woman. 

The 27th of July. 

I can tell I’ve been busy because my phone battery is still up at 80% and I haven’t had it on charge at all. So much crochet. 

That is literally all I have done today. Sat down in the living room this morning, got the wool out and haven’t really moved since. I have actually finished all of the pieces of the minion – today I made all the fingers, thumbs, arms, feet, legs, eye, lens and strap. Next job is to attach them all to the body, then he will be whole! I’m not sure I will make another one – the fingers were quite tricky, especially because they were in black and that is really hard to see the loops in. Next thing I have to make is the panda – more black, hooray!

I have tried the pregablin again and today it has not made me too sleepy or breathless. Hopefully tomorrow is the same. It’s not worked on the pain at all, but if I can cope with the drug, then I can up the dose and see if it works. 

The 5th of May.

More trips out today. Busy busy.

When I woke up, I was struggling, because the oxygen cylinder upstairs had run out. However, things have improved since then. It is always worst in the mornings and evenings. After breakfast, I watched the new episode of Riverdale, and (no spoilers) SO. MANY. REVELATIONS. Also I am sick to death of Veronica Lodge always bringing it back to her and her dad. Do not care, shut up.

I had an appointment at the GP at quarter past one to discuss pain relief. The buprenorphine is making absolutely zero difference to my pain, and she seemed quite surprised to hear this. The next step is to try pregablin instead, so I’ll start that tonight. Fingers crossed it doesn’t affect my breathing.

We came home for about an hour, then we were back out to the dental hospital, just for a check up. They were running late, so I got a lot of The Burial Hour read while we waited. I got called by a young dentist called Joseph who looked about twelve, but was very competent. He looked at my mouth to see if there were any signs of GvHD while another dentist scribed, then we just had to wait for their senior colleague to check I was fine. He was with another patient, and while we sat, we got onto the subject of Netflix, and the girl who’d been writing watches Pretty Little Liars and Riverdale too, and they both watched 13 Reasons Why, so we were in no rush for him to arrive.

Dr. Khan finally came, and thinks my mouth looks the best he’s ever seen it, so they don’t want me back for four months.

As soon as we left, I reopened my book as I was at a critical point, and now it is finished. Oh, Jeffery. Clever, clever Jeffery.

The 6th of May.

Do not like this new pain drug, pregablin. So far it is not making my back feel any better, it has just made me really sleepy all day. Not exactly tired, but my eyes just want to close. It’s not ideal. I’m going to continue with it for a few days, see if the sleepiness wears off and the pain gets any better. I’m not optimistic but I have to give it a chance.

My day has been a really rather dull one, for the most part – I have been sitting with the laptop, typing up the blog entries that I have got behind on posting. There were six to do I got three done. They’re still not posted because I need to add photos and I do that on my iPad. It is very boring but it must be done.

I had a couple of breaks in which I went to sit with Sam and we were both sleepy. He is such a good boy that if nobody wants to adopt him, I will beg Daddy to let us keep him. He won’t live that long, won’t cost us a huge amount of money.

This evening I went out with Sadie to see Joel Dommett. She is a bit in love with him and asked if I’d go so I agreed – although I’ve already seen his show, I was interested to see how he would make the show work, going from a 90 seat room to an 1800 seat one. When we arrived, I saw JT, and we had a little catch up, then he had a look at our tickets and asked if we wanted to go in the wheelchair space instead. Considering they were better seats and I didn’t have to move, I was only too keen to say yes.

The show has definitely improved since October, and I think it actually works better in the larger space. I’d completely forgotten about Laser Dick, but by the second chorus I was singing along again. And he’s changed the ending, which I won’t spoil, but it’s definitely more suitable for the bigger venues he’s doing. He’s not coasting on the fame he’s got from I’m A Celebrity; he’s worked really hard and it’s paying off.