Archives For sleep

The 15th of May.

I feel better today. I didn’t have a nap, but I had a rest, and I don’t know if it helped, but I am not exhausted this evening.

This morning, I wrote up a blog post, and got back to work on my jumper. I have just been doing the rounds of the body which is very mundane. I have to make sure I don’t have a lapse in concentration though, or there’ll be a hole in the body that I can’t fix.

After lunch, I had a phone call from Sheila. It was because she’d done some online PetPlan training and at the end, she hadn’t got a certificate. Honestly, I don’t know why she phoned me, what did expected me to do or say…it was a handy reminder that I needed to do it though, because we’re supposed to complete it by tomorrow.

Shaki arrived at about quarter to five with Dolly and her three kittens Dusty, Dot and Daphne. She had to pretty much drop and dash, so I know who’s who and that’s it. The kittens are seven weeks old, very cute, and friendly enough – I have been able to pet them. Dolly went from her carrier to under the chair and hasn’t emerged since. I will befriend her.

The 16th of May.

I think I want a holiday. Part of me wants to go into hospital for a couple of weeks, but not be ill. Just spend two weeks in my pyjamas, listening to the radio, crocheting. I don’t know why I feel like that’s particularlu different from my normal life but it is. Maybe it’s the isolation. I want to be on my own for a bit.

Today I haven’t done much, even of the crochet. Been trying to bond with the kittens and mum, sitting in the back room, watching Scandal. Dolly has yet to venture out from under the chair in my presence. We know she’s been out because she’s pooed and we’re pretty sure she’s eaten, but only when no one is around. The kittens have bounced around, especially Daphne and Dusty. Dot hides a bit more, but she eventually comes out. I’m trying to pet them as much as possible, teaching them to like it.

They’ve also met Becky who came round to de-stress from SATs week. It seems there is so much pressure on everyone – when I was eleven, we did them, but they were marked in school because Hallfield is independent. Plus we’d been doing exams since Year 3 so it wasn’t something we were unprepared for. I’m just glad I’m not a child now. Everything is fucked. 

 

The 13th of May.

Trying so hard not to fall asleep. I stayed up to see the end of Eurovision because I wanted to see the recap, due to us missing the proper show while we were at Amanda’s birthday party. We ended up staying until ten, and both our voices had suffered this morning from having to shout over the sound system.

This morning, I wrote up a blog post while watching Sunday Brunch, then I got out my crochet and have worked on that all day. Grandma came for lunch, which was about half past one. Since then, I have been tired, but there hasn’t been an opportunity for me to go upstairs and lie down. Instead, I have endured Gillette Soccer Saturday because everyone else cares about football, and I have learned that the men who commentate are really a bit too enthusiastic. Or maybe it’s me; I just don’t give a fuck about any of the teams and the only person I fancy is Jurgen Klopp. And now we’ve got a programme on about the Chelsea Flower Show. I could leave the room, but I feel like that is rude because I only see Grandma when she comes here.

Really looking forward to going to bed. Kittens tomorrow!

The 14th of May.

Jesus Christ I am still tired. Maybe it’s just a build-up of Mach plus hospital appointments plus two late nights in a row? It just seems I flag at about four o’clock every day at the moment.

No kitties today. First of all, the mum cat has been given the name Dolly, so we had to come up with three D names for girl kittens. After consulting the internet, we decided on Dot, Daphne and Dusty. Shaki was going to bring them after they got registered at the vet this afternoon, but secondly, as Dolly is still not super friendly, Shaki will take them all for first vaccs etc in the morning, and we’ll get them later on, so we don’t have to fight to get her into a carrier for a few weeks.

My day has mainly consisted of tv and crochet. I’m cracking on through this jumper, and I’ve started season seven of Scandal. I feel very lazy when all I write about is how much tv I have watched but my energy levels are really low, even for me. Please don’t let this be a precursor to being ill.

 

The 11th of May.

I think I have caught up with all my sleep now. I’ll be out a bit late tonight seeing Suzi and Angela Barnes at the Glee, but it won’t be anything as late as Sunday.

This morning, Mommy had had to go out before I got downstairs, so I had to endure the pain of making my own breakfast. That sounds trivial, but my point is that my back is so bad, it’s agony to stand up for even a few minutes. Fucking discs. Thankfully, she got back in time to help with coffee.

I also had a very productive phone call with EE. Daddy had shown me some deals that Virgin have on SIM-only phones, and when comparing to mine, I realised I was on quite a shit plan. I was paying £20.99 a month for what Virgin charge £9 for. So I called them up and said I wanted a better deal, and now I’m getting 4gb of data (which is enough for me), unlimited texts and calls for £9! Very pleased with myself.

After lunch, I went to the gym. It’s a good ten days since I last went, so I’m expecting to hurt tomorrow. My arms were certainly protesting after less time than usual, so I’m not looking forward to the pain. I had to stop a bit earlier than I might have, because the after-school youths arrived and their body spray was overwhelming.

The 12th of May.

Ugh, my left eye is being irritating and I am supposed to be going out later which will require mascara so I really hope it calms down in the next hour or so. I probably could have done with a bit more sleep but I didn’t get to bed until about midnight and nine hours is not enough for me. My body is rubbish; it requires a lot of rest.

Today has been uneventful. This morning, I pootled about in my pyjamas, drank my coffee and received some wool in the past that I’m going to use for my next jumper.

And after lunch, that is what I started on. A few more episodes of Scandal, and the first eight rounds of said jumper. I’ve only got two more episodes of season 6 left, but Christine is here and she’s a few episodes behind me, so it wouldn’t be very fair of me to ruin the ending for her.

Anyway, I’ve got to eat dinner and get changed before we go out and write a card. But I am so tired.

 

The 1st of May.

It’s our last day with Little Pidge! Shaki rang this morning to discuss arrangements for her, because she’s off to Exeter tomorrow. Shaki will be here about quarter past eight in the morning, so I’ll say my goodbyes tonight. I’ve written up some bullet points about her but it’s very basic. She’s a good kitty, I’m sure once her wound clears up she’ll be homed really quickly because she is lovely.

This morning, I wrote up a blog post, we cleaned Little Pidge’s wound, then I wrote the little bios of the dogs I’m taking to Mach on luggage tags. I also managed to help out a girl who’s going and was looking for tickets for some shows, two of which I could assist with. We’re going to go to a couple of shows together, so I’ve done a good deed and made a new pal!

After lunch, we popped to Tesco to get some instant coffee for Wales. Last year I had none and was sleepy until I got into the town every day. I bought mochas because they’ll be slightly less awful than the lattes. It’s a last resort.

Then, I sat with the cat and we watched Scandal some more. Tomorrow I won’t have my companion!

The 2nd of May.

My back is dreadful this evening and that does not bode well for this weekend. Two very long journeys (well, three-ish hours) are bad, just sitting in the car. Today all I’ve done is sit in the living room. I think I’m just going to have to drink enough to not notice the pain.

The weather has been horrific for most of the day, and I had a book being delivered (new Joona Linna eeeeee), so I decided not to go to the gym. Instead, I put together the present I’ve made for Esmée, then tried to come up with a way to occupy myself for the rest of the day.

We’d just started to eat lunch when I looked at my phone, and found out that John Underwood died two weeks ago. I am stunned. I have known him for a few years, since before his transplant, and we talked a lot about GvHD and how it is to live in hospital. He’d had his ups and downs, but he had seemed to be improving. It was slow, but he was taking steps, both literally and figuratively. I don’t suppose I will ever know what happened and that is difficult. I suppose I’m just in shock. I did not see this coming.

The 10th of February.

Woke up at 6. Let’s be honest, I’m probably not going to have a good sleep until maybe Tuesday night at the earliest? My mind might not be feeling nervous but my body obviously is. I know this because this morning we were talking about nothing in particular yet I nearly burst into tears. Clearly I am not as relaxed as I think I am.

Progress on the photo library bollocks is minimal. It has taken almost the entire day for it to repair, then I tried to be clever to sort them more efficiently but that backfired, so I’ve left it doing something the very slow and tedious way. Be back to it tomorrow.

I have, however, planned what I’m going to say. I’ve decided to keep it short, because nobody wants to hear me wang on for ages and get emotional. After that, I crocheted the monster scarf and watched The Blacklist. Now rugby, dinner, bed.

The 11th of February.

We have sold out.

I couldn’t belive my eyes when I saw the email this morning. I would have screamed, but I was in the bathroom and didn’t want to cause concern. I settled for not being able to stop smiling for a good hour. Unbelievable.

It’s been rather a calm day, to contrast the hectic stress-fest that will be tomorrow. I finally set the computer to do its photo exporting task and have been checking it periodically. I think it will be done by bedtime.

I tried on a dress I’m taking with me in case the thing with Jen falls through, just to check it still fitted, and got out everything I can pack before the morning. Got a list for before we go out. Convinced I will forget something crucial.

I finished the giant chunky scarf, and it will certainly keep me warm when I require it. It’s really heavy! Then I watched some more of The Blacklist, just trying not to think about everything. I don’t think I’ll sleep much tonight. 

The 27th of January.

Ugh. Another bad night, and I am drained. Going to try Zopiclone again tonight – maybe two.

I dressed for the cold, in my knitted trousers and thermal poloneck jumper. Not going anywhere. This morning, I did not spill any water or coffee, and I wrote up a blog post. Then I had to finish Claus – he can’t be a candle without a flame. It’s over a year since I made these the first time and I have learned a lot since then, so these will probably be better than ours.

After lunch, I made a start on Xaver the tree, while watching another recorded film. This time, it was Shutter Island. I think I saw it in the cinema with Sophie, and not again since, so I’d completely forgotten how it goes.

I had planned on reading some more of Gnomon, but I feel so crappy I couldn’t concentrate. Bedtime soon please.

The 28th of January.

Stupid drugs. The Zopiclone kind of worked? It still took me hours to fall asleep, but then I stayed asleep until Mommy came in at ten to wake me up. I had set my alarm but apparently I slept through it. It does, however, mean I have been sleepy all day.

I came downstairs in my pyjamas because I was hungry, so after I’d eaten and had coffee, I went back to my bedroom to get dressed. By the time I was actually ready for the day, it was pretty much lunchtime.

There was no point doing any reading today because I don’t trust my Zopiclone brain to remember any of it. Instead, while I finished and assembled Xaver, I watched three of the Electric Dreams series Channel 4 did a while ago. Turns out, they were quite shit. They’re not long enough for any of the ideas to be really fleshed out so they’re like a weak Black Mirror. Maybe what they’re based on are better? I’ll look into the written works.

Maybe tonight I’ll have a normal sleep? I’m tired enough.

The 25th of January.

I have had to take lots of deep breaths today, which means I am tired. I’m taking a Zopiclone tonight so I get a good sleep. I woke myself up whispering angrily in my sleep because I was dreaming that I was having an argument with someone from The Biggest Loser.

So I have spent pretty much the entire day sat in the same position, doing the same thing. First, I was doing a blog post, then I carried on with the doily and my hand aches. I’m on the penultimate round, so I’ve at least been very productive. Hopefully I get it finished tonight.

Mommy was out with Grandma for ages this afternoon, so I had a long tv binge – Riverdale, then Black Lightning (I’m going to give it a couple more episodes before I pass judgement) and Carrie, which I recorded at Christmas. To be honest, I fast-forwarded the first half, because I just wanted to watch the bit where she gets her revenge. No need to see the bit where she gets tormented.

Ugh god I want it to be bedtime.

The 26th of January.

Zopiclone didn’t work. Sometimes that happens. No reason, but it means I’ve had little sleep and a drug hangover that’s made me feel like shit all day. Bleah.

It’s Mommy and Daddy’s wedding anniversary today (38 years!) so the first thing I did was give them their card. Then breakfast, coffee, hairwash. I tidied up the back of the doily I finished last night, then wrote the notes on the patterns for the Christmas dudes I am starting.

I spilled water all over the table again because I apparently have no muscle control, and it went much further this time, so Daddy and I had to spread everything out and dry it with paper towels. I’m going to stop being allowed beverages without lids.

After lunch, Mommy and Daddy went to see Darkest Hour (I know, so romantic) then they were having dinner, so I have had the house to myself for the afternoon. I have pretty much made the first Christmas chap, Claus the candle, while watching films. The Host, which I recorded ages ago and was meh, then Captain America: Civil War because Black Panther comes out soon and I needed to remind myself of the “previously on”.

Domino’s for dinner. What else?