Archives For Trine

The 23rd of January.

Not a huge amount of excitement to report today. After watching Surgeons last night, on which a liver transplant was performed, I had a dream that I was having another one, but it was with an epidural. I did not enjoy it.

This morning, I wrote up a blog post, and decided what to crochet next. I had been doing a doily before I did the bears, so I have gone back to that. Finish that, then I’ve got an order for some Christmas chaps for a friend in Iceland so I’ll get started on that.

After lunch, I had a trip to the QE for immunology clinic. This time, I met Professor Lane, and I had to explain my history to him which was fun. When I got to the part about the accidental transplant, he said “That must be quite rare” and I said “Yes, only me” so I think he’s going to look up Mark’s paper. Anyway, having looked at my bloods and the tests Dr. Antrobus ordered, he thinks that actually I have a strong constitution and is not currently concerned about my immune system. I am just to continue avoiding germs and being a hero.

The 24th of January.

I was woken up by the rain this morning. So loud! So I got up about an hour earlier than I planned, but nevermind.

Because I was awake early, I did some crocheting after breakfast, then I had a chiro appointment at eleven. There was nothing major that I had felt, but she found enough to work on. I brought up the fact that the anaesthetist the other week had mentioned that I had a mild form of scoliosis, and she said yes, but it’s so minimal she hadn’t ever felt it necessary to treat, let alone bring up.

Mommy ended up taking a cancelled appointment after mine because she’s somehow developed tennis elbow in her left arm. That’s a mystery.

We then had a brief trip into Sutton so I could put the cheques Taid gave me for Christmas and my birthday into the bank, and buy a small mirror. I had one on the living room table that was useful for my eye drops, but when I spilled my coffee last week, it disappeared. We can’t find it anywhere, so I got a new one from Superdrug for 49p.

This afternoon, I have watched How to Get Away with Murder and crocheted. Do this doily.

The 28th of March. 

I have felt a-fucking-trocious for most of my day. High levels of oxygen have been required, and even then I have not felt so good. 

This morning I was needing 1.5-2 litres of oxygen just to sit and eat my breakfast. I finished the monster doily, then there wasn’t much morning left before we had to go out to Black Sheep. 

Obviously I took a small cylinder of oxygen with me, and I was doing alright to begin with. However, after James had put the lightener in, I had to go to the bathroom and I knew I wouldn’t get there without help. Because of the fumes and the spray etc in the air, I had to put it up to 3 litres and I was still struggling, but I didn’t want to go any higher for fear of ploughing through the cylinder. I had to text Mommy to get her to bring me a new one mid-appointment because the small ones only last 1.5-2 hours on high volumes. 

I told James off for leaving, but I forgive him because his reasons are good and Saskia will take care of me. We have nailed it with the colour – I look like a load of pixie sticks have been tipped onto my head. In a good way. Michaela is having another baby so I congratulated her, and she gave me a trim. 

I got home at about half past four, so not much has happened since then, but I’ve got the oxygen down again, thank god. I felt absolutely awful. 

The 29th of March. 

Vast improvement. I had a crappy sleep which I am putting down to low sats – when I sat up, they were 88, despite me having been on oxygen all night. However, I have got better since then.

This morning, I wrote up the blog post I should have done yesterday, we had a delivery of oxygen, then I had my rescheduled chiro appointment from last week. I was considering postponing it again, but I did not feel too terrible and my back had started protesting. 

I took the small cylinder with me, so I was able to get into all the necessary positions, which was good because pretty much all of my back had tightened up. Surprisingly, my neck didn’t need any crunching, just massaging into submission. 

Once home, we had lunch, then I updated my phone software (I know) and took a lot of selfies to document my new pretty hair. I started crocheting a new doily, and I’ve got my oxygen down to 1 litre. I wish we could work out what causes me to need it more some days and not others. Knowing me, there is probably no reason.  

The 15th of September. 

A decidedly less great day. I woke up so excited and full of beans because today was the day I was finally going to get some answers about my back, but now I just feel tired and deflated. 

This morning I wrote about yesterday, then was at the chiro again. My neck needed some serious attention, and I promised I’d let Trine know how my appointment with Mr. Harland this afternoon went. 

We went home for about forty five minutes, then back out to The Spire to finally see the surgeon and get some answers. I had a little bit of time to read my book before he called me in, but I was very ready when he did. We talked a little bit about my background, then he showed us my scan pictures (I wish I’d taken photos now) and talked us through them. It is the discs that are causing my pain – the ones at the top are okay, but as you go down my spine, they get thinner and thinner, down to about a fifth of the size they should be, and are now just a couple of millimetres thick. At the very bottom, it looks like two of the vertebrae are on their way to fusing together, and what’s left of the discs is prolapsing. He’s never seen scans of a back like mine belonging to a 25 year old. Maybe a 50 year old. Of course. And it turns out, there’s no surgery he can do to fix it. I’m being referred to the pain team and their physio, who will hopefully have a solution for the agony. Maybe pills, maybe patches, maybe steroid injections into my spine, we’ll see. I’m disappointed because I was really hoping for something more immediate. It might get better when the bones fuse, I’ll definitely get stiffer, and that’s it. No real cause – not steroids, just a case of bad genes and bad luck. I’m an unfixable disaster. 

The 16th of September. 

This is not going to be an exciting entry. I had a really bad night; awake on and off since 3am. Maybe it was the incredibly noisy weather, I don’t know. It was not good. 

I emerged from my bedroom at half past eight, and spent my morning getting my phone ready to back up so such my new one was delivered I could get started setting it up. It did not go to plan. 

Everything ran rather slowly. I only started trying to back up the current phone after lunch, and I have been sat at the computer all afternoon. The first backup, during which I watched Bad Neighbours (I give it 3 stars), failed for some reason, then the second go took the entirety of 22 Jump Street (3.5 stars) and I thought that had failed too. However, when I went to try a third time, it appeared that a backup had been made and I could finally start on the new one!

My time has not been totally wasted – I have finished the snood I’ve been working on. It’s very long and so will keep my face warm and snuggly. 

Anyway. Back to work. I suspect I will be here all evening. 

The 5th of September. 

All the sitting at the table yesterday was a very poor decision. Getting out of bed this morning was excruciating, and it has only got worse as the day’s gone on. I am supposed to be at an Old Hallfieldians meeting tonight but I can barely walk so I’ve had to email my apologies. Every movement has to be carefully considered. 

I was up early for Shaki to arrive with Rufus. He is teeny-weeny! Mainly black with some white bits on his face and feet. He has smelled my hand and not hissed, but he has resolutely stayed hiding in a box all day, only emerging to eat in secret. I keep going in to say hi and see if he wants to say hello but he just sits very still and stares at me. Sigh. 

So, not moving much means crocheting. I think I’ve finished the blanket I’ve been doing, but now I look at it, I’m not sure it’s wide enough. The chevrons make it wrinkle up, so I need to squish it under some heavy books and see how I feel then. If I need to, I can unravel it all because I haven’t cut any ends. 

I have to get up early tomorrow too because Radio WM called and want to talk about Harry Potter again. I don’t really understand why but whatever, I’m available. Quarter past seven. 

The 6th of September. 

I didn’t think it was possible but today my back has actually been worse. Like when I take a step I can feel the force of my foot on the ground shooting up into my back and it’s agonising. We finally got through to Mr. Harland’s secretary and she couldn’t even find me on a waiting list for an appointment with him. This was very disheartening news. We decided to speak to Trine and see what she thought/recommended. She really didn’t like the sound of my appointment not even existing yet, and she knows everything that’s been happening, so she’s making a referral to him privately for me today. It’s going to cost some money but honestly this is intolerable and we at least need to know what’s going to happen and he might be able to do something about the pain until the matter is resolved. Really hoping his private secretary rings very soon. 

I’ve moved very little again, just occasionally going to see Rufus. He mews a lot but doesn’t want to be stroked so I say hello and sit for a while before leaving again. Think we’ll let him out tomorrow to explore the room a bit more. 

Oh and my early radio thing was fine. I was awake because I had a terrible night – every time I turned over, I felt this violent pain in my back. I thought I’d check out these Pottermore ebooks that were mentioned yesterday and it was a good thing I did because that was the main topic. Five minutes of chat and I was done. 

The 4th of May. 

Just been playing with the kittens and the sun is out – it’s a great day. 

Woke up from a really odd dream about having seven hamsters in individual balls in a bag and I really needed to get home to let them out. I had a little bit of kitty time this morning, between writing up a blog post and going out to the hygienist. That all went very well – I am good at brushing and flossing twice a day so I have a good gum score, but I still had to have the abrasive flossing done. Shudder. 

This afternoon, I thought I might as well go to the gym because I didn’t need to supervise the kittens. Nothing upsetting happened today; people who irritate me only arrived by the time I had finished, so I had an excellent session. Christine rang while I was waiting for my lift, so I was telling her about the kittens and I think she’s a little bit jealous she isn’t here right now. She’s off to see The Maids tonight at Trafalgar Studios which ought to be good. 

When we got back, we let the kittens out for an explore and a play. Had a worry when Frieda got behind the tv cabinet and I thought she’d get stuck, but she found her way out. The path in has now been blocked up with cushions. Freddie had a wonderful time chasing his tail, and Freya was determined to get the ball. Oh, to be so free of care. 

The 5th of May. 

Well I feel better about my back and elbow but worse about some other things that I need to ring Dr. Robinson about. 

I was at the chiro this morning and I told Trine about all my aches and pains. My gristly ribs was just a misbehaving muscle so that was easy to fix, but she couldn’t do a great deal for the rest. She’s keen for me to get a bone density scan because I could have a vertebrae fracture, and she thinks my elbow feels “anatomically different” and there could be a bone spur? So I have to bring all this up with Andy on the 18th. 

This afternoon I’ve been watching Netflix and allowing the kittens to roam free around the room. They are so full of energy, running, jumping and climbing all over stuff. Lots of pretend hunting too – bushy tails galore! Eventually they wore themselves out and I had three sleepy kittens on my lap. Oh, and Freddie is another hair-eater. What is it with cats and my hair?

I’ve been waiting for two books from Amazon to arrive all day and as I started writing that sentence, they did! They said I could pay £5 extra for them to be delivered today (the hardback’s release date) or have free delivery in about ten days. I chose the free delivery, then got an email last night saying they were on their way! Feeling super smug. 

The 9th of March. 

Oh god I am so over winter. It is supposedly going to be sixteen degrees by the end of the week; the weather people better not be wrong. I’m sick of my toes being cold. 

I have tried to spend much of my day with Monica. I picked her up onto my lap last night and she stayed and was happy, so we’re definitely friends. After I’d done a blog post, I went into the back room to hang out with her while I watched what was left of This Morning. She was not in the mood for hugs, she just wanted to play, so I didn’t try to grab her. 

I left her to have lunch, then went back to watch a Pretty Little Liars but she stayed under the bed for that. I was supposed to be meeting someone for coffee at four, so Mommy gave me a lift because she had to do things in town too. I had a feeling that the person wasn’t going to turn up so I’d taken a book, The Outsider by Albert Camus. I sat there for half an hour and drank my coffee while I read, then I left. Oh well! Not entirely surprised. No second chance. 

The 10th of March. 

I got on the scales this morning and I’ve lost weight again. I suspected I had because my jeans are looser and I’ve been finding it difficult to finish my main meal in the evenings, like my stomach has shrunk again. This doesn’t make sense, and I don’t know how to fix it. It could be related to the antibiotics I’m on but they’ve never affected me like this before. I suppose I’ll finish the course, then I need to see what happens. I really don’t need to get any thinner. 

I saw Monica briefly this morning, but had to leave her at twelve so I could eat lunch before we had to go to the chiro. Trine crunched me a bit but not a great deal, thankfully. More neck-squeezing than I would like. She’s asked me not to get any more coughs and I’ve said I will try. I also showed the receptionists pictures of Monica and they think she’s adorable because she is. 

We popped into the GP’s on the way home to give them a copy of my vaccination protocol, because I’ve never had the post-transplant jabs you’re meant to have after six months (I was always too poorly) so those are due to start in a couple of weeks. 

This afternoon I had a good, long kitty cuddle until my leg went numb. But it’s worth it; she keeps me warm.  


The 19th of January. 

I managed to go out today without receiving fearful stares from those around me. I had quite a fun morning with the doorbell ringing multiple times. The first visit was from the postman, and he arrived while I was in the bathroom, so I had to rush out to get my birthday card from Christine, my first coffee from Pact, and my wool for Esme’s giraffe. Another ring from an APC man who delivered a box for Mommy that was “fragile” and held “perishables”. Very mysterious, I wonder what it is? The final person here was Gail asking me to take a parcel for Alison which was massive but wasn’t a present for me, just skiwear for Jonathan. 

After lunch, we went into Sutton so I could get a box to post Suzi’s crocheted stuff in, which thankfully is big enough to hold the extra thing she’s asked for, and had a lovely chat with the girl in Paperchase about Alan Rickman because I was wearing my Gryffindor scarf and she’s obviously a super cool person. I also got some wool that I can use to finish the baby blanket I was doing over the Christmas period. When we’d finished, Mommy took me to Black Sheep to get my fringe trimmed, but when she was parking, she scraped the car she was pulling in front of and caused damage to one of the front lights. She wrote a note with her details on but we haven’t heard from them yet which is very odd considering you’re only allowed to park there for an hour. Michaela was annoyed at herself because she’s dropped her phone in the toilet, and I consoled her, reminding her I’d done exactly the same thing in that very salon.

The rest of the afternoon has been crochet! That and trying and failing to fix the WiFi. Such excitement. 

The 20th of January. 

A very similar day to yesterday – lots of crochet with a trip out in the middle, but this time to the chiro. 

This morning I had my breakfast, coffee, then fit in a small amount of crochet before we had to go out to see Trine. It really hurt to even lie on my front this time, but I clenched my jaw and got through it because it was necessary. My back popped in a few places, and my neck crunched. I also needed some massage on my gristly ribs again but it was markedly improved. 

When we got home, we had lunch, the postman brought lots of cards for me to open tomorrow, I have been busily crocheting away while watching Pretty Little Liars, and now have only one tiny bit of this thing left to make tonight before I assemble it. 

I’m so excited for tomorrow and Friday. All the tasty foods! I also iced my birthday cake (Curly Wurly cake) this afternoon, and have just ruined, then fixed it. I was doing extra decoration with melted chocolate but it looked utterly dreadful, making me wish I hadn’t done it at all. We were able to lift off the chocolate with knives, and I can make it pretty tomorrow.