Archives For virus

The 6th of October. 

Last night was bad again. Don’t think I fell asleep at all until past two, and even then it was punctuated by coughs. Blog posts take so much longer when I’m coughing. Keep having to stop and hunch over to move some phlegm. Spent most of the day without my cardigan on because I’ve been so warm. 

My chest has rumbled all afternoon. Rumble, cough, rumble, cough. I can barely write because I have to keep stopping. This morning I was quieter and I thought things might be starting to slightly improve but that seems incorrect. 

Daddy is concerned that I’ve got something fungal, so if there’s time on Wednesday he’d like me to get my bloods done (I don’t know how this is supposed to fit in with my lymphoscintigram). Personally I think it’s still just a virus but getting them checked will make him feel better. 

What would make me feel better would be for the coughing to improve. Or at least decrease in frequency. I’m so exhausted. 

The 7th of October. 

Sleep not terrible but not good. I’m so tired. And my back hurts so much. When I get up to walk, I am bent over at a thirty degree angle. Straightening up is too painful. 

Most of my day has been spent leaning forward, working on something I’m crocheting for Heidi. It is going to be rather larger than I had originally anticipated. I hope she doesn’t mind. 

I’m not sure there’s anything else to say. I feel like trash. It’s been two weeks now. Can I start getting better soon please? It’s been so long since I had a normal virus, I’ve forgotten how long they last. Some improvement next week would be nice. I really hope it can’t get worse. 

The 25th of June. 

It appears I should have done a blog post this morning. Whoops. Oh well, I shall do it tomorrow. 

I still feel horrific in regards to both the referendum and my cough. Mommy refuses to discuss it (the referendum, not the cough) because I get too upset and I think she is concerned about my blood pressure. 

I’ve spent most of my day trying to earn the trust of the new kittens. Three are generally okay with me – the two black ones and the tortoiseshell, but the other two are really not that keen. Actually that’s not entirely the case, only one still backs away from my hand, but because they look so similar, I’ve no idea which one it is. 

This afternoon, I was watching Netflix while they were in the cage (letting them all out to run around on my own is quite a task) and Daddy came in to say hello to them. He was on his hands and knees, giving them all a stroke and having a little chat, and I just thought this was highly amusing seeing as he was not that thrilled with the fostering idea in the first place. 

My shoulder and neck muscles are beginning to ache from all this. By my calculations, I’ve had this particular cough for about ten days, two weeks max, so I think I can expect at least another week. I hope it’s not much longer. 

The 26th of June. 

So tired. I was awake off and on all night because my throat kept getting really dry, so I had to keep drinking to stop the coughing. I seem to be less terrible during the day, then towards the evening, my chest starts rumbling and the cough is constant, and I can’t stop until I’ve shifted the phlegm that’s decided to move. Gah!

This morning I did yesterday’s blog post, and we have more giant crumpets, so that at least cheered me up about life. Craig David was on Sunday Brunch, which took me back to the good old days of Re-Rewind, when I was about ten years old and life was simple. I immersed myself in that while I heard of Jeremy Corbyn’s cabinet dropping like flies. British politics is an absolute disaster right now. 

After lunch was kitten time. They still hiss at me when I go in, but then they allow me to stroke them so I don’t know, they’re just daft. I did manage to pick up three (one at a time) and they let me hold them on my lap and pet them, and as soon as they got a bit wiggly, I put them back in. I get the feeling Nola (big black one) is going to be one of those cats that likes to sit like a human. I think that by the time they have to leave, we might be friends. 

The 17th of June. 

Oh dear, I feel ghastly. I seem to have rid myself of one cough to pick up another one which is worse. I didn’t sleep well because my nose was partially blocked so I had to breathe through my mouth, I kept waking up to cough…I really didn’t want to get out of bed. 

This morning, I got my blog post done, then went to let the kittens out for the first time since we brought them home yesterday. They were delighted and ran around like mad things. The food bowl was turned upside down, dried food all over the floor, just chaos. Eventually, Gabby got under the bed, so I put the other two back in the cage and just had to wait for her to emerge.

After lunch, Daddy and I went to see The Nice Guys. It is a bit ridiculous – it’s entertaining, lots of action, although I had the problem I often have when there’s shooting in films – why can’t people who are supposedly using guns a great deal such terrible shots, even when they’ve got a machine gun? It irks me greatly. Also, for any fans of very old America’s Next Top Model, Yaya from Cycle 3 is in it! She has not aged at all. 

I really want to go to bed, but it’s only quarter to eight. Maybe I’ll go upstairs after Would I Lie To You, take some Zopiclone, no dreams. 

The 18th of June. 

I am exhausted. I had two Zopiclone last night but they didn’t knock me out like they usually do; it took a lot longer than normal, but I don’t know if that was because I couldn’t get my breathing right, and everything needs to work together for the tablets to be effective. So I have the “hangover” without the benefit. 

There is no impulse to move if I don’t have to, and every three or four breaths, my chest starts rumbling and I have to shift the phlegm. Sometimes one cough will get it up, but more likely is that I’ll have to keep forcing them out until my throat clears. Then I’ll need to blow my nose and what feels like gallons of junk comes out; I don’t know where in my head it’s being stored but it just keeps coming. I’ve got decongestant and an olbas inhaler to keep my sinuses clear and carbocisteine to keep the phlegm from sticking anywhere, but other than that, I can only wait for it to bugger off when is ready. Fuck you, lung disease. 

The adoptions both went off without a hitch, everybody behaved themselves and I’ve heard that Gabby and Gabe (now Florence and Freddie) are out and pottering about, and I haven’t spoken to Eliott who took Gracie but I’m going to assume no news is good news. 

When everyone was gone, I sat and filled in paperwork and registered all the microchips, and since then, I have flooped.

The 3rd of January. 

It’s never a good sleep when Chona is on. She is one of my nurse nemeses. She just grates on me and does utterly stupid things like trying to bleed my line back through the blue clave despite me having told her multiple times that it wouldn’t work, it would just clog up in the clave. Then it happened and she was surprised, because five years of having an apheresis line is apparently not enough experience to know what you’re talking about. She also felt the need to send newbie Mark in to check my blood pressure while I was trying to go to sleep because she thought it might have magically got better in twenty minutes, and he thought he wouldn’t get a SATs reading because I have nail polish on. Sweetheart, it doesn’t make a blind bit of difference. 

Today I hoped to see a doctor who might have some news, but all he had to say is they still don’t know what’s wrong with me, the viral swabs aren’t back, and I’ll be here until at least Monday when they might put me on oral treatment. I’m not best pleased with him, and  he’s going to find that out tomorrow.

When he was gone, I had a cry at Mommy because I am so sick of being here, not knowing what’s going on, not being able to talk to any of my doctors, and I can’t fucking breathe. 

I just don’t know how I’m going to get through tomorrow. 

The 4th of January. 

Home. Mommy had to come back last night and stay with me because I just felt helpless and could’ve ended up in a very bad situation. I also had a full-on go at Chona because she tried to draw back through the clave again on the red lumen which I’ve told her doesn’t bleed anyway. I actually was almost yelling “No you don’t listen when I talk to you, Chona”, I was so angry. She eventually shut up and did the correct things. 

Elizabeth who is an excellent nurse was on today so we told her how I felt, then when the doctor came round, it emerged that as soon as we’d established that I have flu, I could’ve gone home! The IV mero is for bacterial infection which I do not have, so the last few days of stress and misery have been for nothing. 

So now I’m at home with drugs, oxygen and my own bed. Just have to wait for my body to defeat the flu in its own time. So about three weeks. 

The 21st of October.

I feel like hell. It took me hours to get to sleep because I couldn’t stop coughing, and this morning it took about an hour for me to get up and dressed. 

I’ve basically not moved from the armchair because everything is massively difficult. I’m not sure how I’m going to get back upstairs. My abs, ribs and back ache so much, every cough is painful. I’m quite glad I have photopheresis tomorrow so they can take samples of the cack I’m bringing up and then see if it’s a virus or something they can actually treat. 

I am so tired. I need to go upstairs really early because last night it took me forever to actually get into bed. 

The 22nd of October.

More coughing. I had a Zopiclone which I think was beneficial, and I’ll do it again tonight. 

I had to move out of the armchair to go to hospital for photopheresis. They gave me a sample pot for anything I bring up (unfortunately nothing has come up far enough so far) but they also took bloods and a viral swab so they might show something. They showed that my haemoglobin was 8.4 though so I’ll be having a bag or two of O-neg in the morning, meaning I have to get up early tomorrow so that just fills me with joy. 

Ugh I just feel like shit because I’m exhausted and all my muscles and bones ache from the coughing. And I’m not even allowed ibuprofen because I’m on steroids! And we can’t taper the steroids while I’m poorly because that’ll make the gvh kick off more!


The 19th of October.

Oh, no. It seems I have developed a dry cough that is unproductive and is just an irritance. It also makes it very difficult to indulge in one of my favourite activities – talking. 

I had Zopiclone again last night so my sleep was pretty unbroken which was nice and I didn’t get up until half past eight. 

I watched Sunday Brunch, and Mommy washed my hair. This afternoon, I’ve read The Blue Nowhere, crocheted, and watched Agents of SHIELD. I need to catch up before the new series starts. 

The reason I don’t think about the really big stuff is because it makes me like this – lovelorn and lonely, pining after something I can never have. 

The 20th of October.

I seem to be rather poorly. I am coughing up junk and it has just got worse throughout the day. I really haven’t done anything in an effort to conserve energy for Ed Sheeran tonight. 

He was super super good. For one man to hold an entire arena by himself for two hours is pretty spectacular. I couldn’t join in with all the crowd singalongs he was initiating because I would have bust a gut coughing. He can sing and play really well live. His rapping is also very accomplished – you can tell he has a frustrated hip hop star within. I was slightly offended by his insinuation that loads of women only liked The Hobbit since he was on the soundtrack. I think he’ll find some women have liked LOTR since it was in cinemas back in the day.

I am utterly exhausted and am not sure how I’m going to get upstairs.